Maybe tonight I’ll call ya

After my blood turns in to alcohol.

No, I just wanna hold ya.

Tell me where you are tonight. I don’t want to be lying here on this bed wondering how something that happened in the past wont let its talons off but instead keeps clinging on to me,and continuously and successfully draining every breath from me. Tonight, I want to hear you sing. I want to watch you sing. I want to feel your eyes burn through my soul as you glance up and look at me. I want that feeling again and again tonight. I want to smell you and I want my clothes to smell of you. I want my skin to smell of your musky cologne and your fresh linen. And I want you to sing to me.Tonight, I want to be anywhere else with you but here. Cause I know you can do that. I know you can take me from here;and lift me to places I’ve never been and make me feel things I know you can make me feel. Tonight, I want you and all your selfish thoughts. Your selfish thoughts and your ridiculous charm. Your beautiful voice and your smart mouth. Your guitar and your scruffy beard. I’m not hesitant. I’ll be selfish. I’ll be daring. I’ll be wrong. I’ll be damned. I’ll be something I’m not. Just tonight.


Yours truly,

Painted Shadow.


I can hear them laughing

Not at you,
But at me.
I can hear them say things with certainty.
Like they know me.
I can hear them assume things
and then repeat it as if it were true.
Can’t you hear them?
They’re saying your name too.
I wish I could be like you
And not care.
I wish my laugh was louder than theirs.
Yours is.
That’s why you don’t hear them laughing.
You can only hear your broken laugh
and it makes you happy.
I wish I could hear my laugh more often.
at least for some time. 

Yours truly,

Painted Shadow


That girl noone knew

She would cry,

just to know what it feels like

She would laugh

just to know what it sounds like

She would fall in love

just to know what a broken heart is

she would cut her hair short and wear clothes that a boy would

just to know what its like to be a boy

She would play with her dolls

just to know what its like to have freinds

She would cut herself

just to know what pain is

She would pretend to drown in the lake

just to see if anyone noticed

She would tel him she loved him

just so that someone might tell her that

She would run fast

just to feel the raindrops beat her face

She had no friends, she had no love

She had no family, she had no laugh

She lived near the tiny pot hole,

that nobody came by because

it was in a street that nobody knew

next to the house which was far away

from the closest place, Aunt Carol’s..