Maybe tonight I’ll call ya

After my blood turns in to alcohol.

No, I just wanna hold ya.

Tell me where you are tonight. I don’t want to be lying here on this bed wondering how something that happened in the past wont let its talons off but instead keeps clinging on to me,and continuously and successfully draining every breath from me. Tonight, I want to hear you sing. I want to watch you sing. I want to feel your eyes burn through my soul as you glance up and look at me. I want that feeling again and again tonight. I want to smell you and I want my clothes to smell of you. I want my skin to smell of your musky cologne and your fresh linen. And I want you to sing to me.Tonight, I want to be anywhere else with you but here. Cause I know you can do that. I know you can take me from here;and lift me to places I’ve never been and make me feel things I know you can make me feel. Tonight, I want you and all your selfish thoughts. Your selfish thoughts and your ridiculous charm. Your beautiful voice and your smart mouth. Your guitar and your scruffy beard. I’m not hesitant. I’ll be selfish. I’ll be daring. I’ll be wrong. I’ll be damned. I’ll be something I’m not. Just tonight.


Yours truly,

Painted Shadow.


He wrote a song.He wrote one for me.

Music was HIS thing. He conveyed his feelings, every single one of them through songs. Some of them were his songs, and some of them were the ones we hear on the radio. Yes, he wrote songs and gave them to me. He wrote songs just to show how much he meant to me. Yet they never came out of his mouth. Rarely. On special occasions it did. But Music was HIS thing.  He played numerous instruments and wanted to learn so much more. He adored it. It was his passion. And it was never good enough for him. He always wanted more.He always wanted to ‘get better’, even if he was the most brilliant musician ive ever seen. He was never satisfied with his talent. Never. His words flowed like water on to his books as he scribbled down lyrics. He had one book, where he wrote everything. His songs, how he felt about me, Everything. To me, it was everything. He was.Everything.


Yours truly,

Painted Shadow