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It doesn’t look that easy.

I’m trying to figure out why I keep bending the top corner of our pages. I’m trying to figure out why some of the pages are ‘dog-eared’. I’ve scratched at the words a million times, knowing I can never erase them, yet I still try to tear them apart. Cause trying is better than not doing anything. Trying to turn a page is better than staring at it, wishing it turned by itself. I suppose burning the pages is an option. But fire catches far too quickly. So I can’t burn it. I’m not strong enough to burn it just yet. Instead, I just want to turn to the next page. I don’t want to dog-ear the page. I just want to turn it over and start writing. I miss writing about new things and new experiences with new pens. I keep using the same pen, cause you wrote in it once.

I just want to turn a page. Stop haunting me. and stop tormenting me to stay on the same page. I don’t want to anymore.  For Pete’s sake just let me be.

 

Yours truly,

Painted Shadow

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Author:

I stare at walls hoping that something would guide me to another dimension where everything makes sense. I take life as it comes. I reside in which is now known to be the fastest growing city in the Middle East, Dubai. Surrounded by fake greenery and dusty air, I long for rain. I long for rain to drench my very being, untill i feel nothing but clean and revived. I dream of happy things and i know for certain that Peter pan and pixies and fairies and Santa exists. I know. Because theres no point in not believing. Im a child. I am a grain of sand. I am a speckle of dust in this polluted world. I am a spirit roaming the end of the earth, trying to find that wall. (Read the page Painted shadow for details)

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